I often wonder if my being a consumer advocate feeds this day to day weight I carry, I don't know and maybe someday I will stop, but for now telling my story helps others and I feel that at least something good is coming out of all this.
I'm traveling tomorrow, I made these plans months ago, I'm staying with friends, visiting my Aunt who's close to 90 who I haven't seen in five years and sure enough my anxiety has started to kick in, also called anticipatory anxiety, I sometimes wonder why even travel at at if so much worrying about what will my friends be feeling, going out to dinner, arriving and wanting to just do what I do at home, avoid the situation, just writing this I'm feeling I need to stop a moment to take half of a klonopin, 2:07 pm, time to tap into my coping skills.
2:34 pm, I took my pill, put away the laundry, put on some relaxing music, lit an incense stick and visualized a stop sign, all of the above help, tomorrow is day zero. I'll be okay, use the coping skills I know and focus on everyone whom I'm visiting, they all know of my diagnoses, so that's half the pressure off myself, the rest is up to me.
I feel somewhat better, but would like to hear from you, what do you do when anxiety consumes you